Ben's Spring Break

I can not wait till spring break. My friend Chad is coming to spend a night. To begin with my friend Chad will like our house because downstairs we have lots of fun things to do! We can play awesome games all day and night. I like the games Chad plays because his games are fun. His games are like star wars, fighting and monster hide and seek. Sometimes monster hide and seek is scary for me. Another thing I’m exited about spring break is that Chad and I can finally sleep in! Well because my brothers are sleeping up in the living room and there is no more school for a week! After we get up we will get dressed, eat breakfast and go play some more awesome games! That is what I am going to do this spring break.

How I would spend 1,000,000

A Million Dollars

If I had a million dollars I would buy a lot of stuff. To begin, [t1] with[t2]  my million dollars I would buy a car[t3]  . I[t4] n my awesome new car I would go to North Dakota because my family lives there. I want to build a zoo in North Dakota. I[t5]  will get all my family in my new car and we will look at the sleepy [t6] animals in my new zoo. I will go to chucky cheeses in my new car because theirplace is so awesome! Who does not love their[t7]  heart pumping rides, funny toys[t8] , games and pepperoni PIZZA[t9] ?  

                                        

Also I will grow a garden[j10]  to grow food for friends I can grow food for my family too. I would grow watermelons, apple trees and more things. It would be fun for me to grow a garden because I’ve never have grown a garden. That’s how I would spend my million dollars!       [j11] 

By Ben Hanson

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 [t1]Get rid of the comma

 [t2]To begin, with my million dollars I would blah blah

 [t3]period

 [t4]In my awesome new car  I would….

 [t5]Can you tie the car into this. For example….I will get all my family members to get into my car and we will go party at Chuck y Cheeses restaurant.

 [t6]I cant see all of them. What are some adjectives to tell about the animals. For example. Friendly, spunky, sleepy, dopey, fierce some

 [t7]Add adjective before rides. Example…heart pumping rides

 [t8]Add adjective before toys.

 [t9]Adjective before pizza?

 [j10]This sentence needs more to it.

 [j11]Good start to a sentence but not a complete thought.

Iroquois Tribe

Reptiles